Fiends Forever

As I’m sat here preparing myself to watch The Walking Dead, I thought I would talk a little bit about my love of horror. It’s about time you got to know me!

ab94f83683963449de32883393a7fd76

If you hadn’t realised by now, I love all things creepy, gory and genuinely anything that your average person would cringe at. I have always had an interest in the supernatural and anything ghoulish and this became more apparent when I was in junior school. I would find myself creating ‘ghost clubs’ and constantly researching about the supernatural and discussing it with my friends, regardless of how terrified they would get. I specifically remember a book in the school library about ghosts that I used to read over and over; I wish I could still remember the name of it!

Luckily for a weirdo like me, I had a best friend who was equally as weird (YES ELLIE, I’M LOOKING AT YOU!). We would spend so much time talking about things that most youngsters would have no interest in. We would love scaring ourselves and would often encounter supernatural experiences together. Now, there is a very likely chance that there was a logical reason for all of these goings on and that we just hyped each other up to the point where we thought we saw/heard something, or perhaps it was genuinely real as I’m fairly sure some things I have experienced have been real.In the future I would like to talk more about my spooky experiences because I personally love hearing other people’s ghost stories.

So, from quite a young age, Ellie and I would watch horror films together. I specifically remember watch Hide and Seek, Final Destination and When a Stranger Calls together. I also, from a young age, had an obsession with witches, an obsession which still stands today and I honestly have no idea where this obsession came from. When I was younger my parents would always tell me that monsters and ghosts etc. weren’t real however, as I got older I actually discovered that my mum believes a lot more than she let on; what a little liar right!tenor

As I got older, more and more horror was introduced to my life; Vampires, Zombies, Werewolves, Ghosts, Witches, you name it. Then around the age of fifteen/sixteen I discovered the world of serial killers. It all began with an unhealthy interest in Jack the Ripper and progressed from there.

Nowadays, I’m well known amongst friends and family for living and breathing halloween and horror. I love the films, the books, the television programs and I especially love true life creepy stories. I can’t help it.

We are the weirdos mister giphy (1)

Advertisements

What Makes a Writer?

The other night I had a dream. I mean, to be fair, I dream every night and usually remember them however, this dream really got me thinking; at what point in my life do I become a writer?

In my dream, I was having a debate with my friends after they had told me that I wasn’t allowed to call myself a writer. My dream friends believed that unless you had a piece of writing ‘professionally published’ then you could not call yourself a writer. They also believed that to claim this title, you had to write for your living. Now, this got me thinking; I technically declare myself a writer, is this okay?

Currently, I do not write for a living. This is definitely not an ideal situation for me as I’m desperate to pursue a career in writing and hopefully one day I will have achieved that and, fingers crossed, I will have published works available to purchase. I will of course, continue to work towards this goal.

I write almost every day, whether that’s a blog post or working on my novel so, I would class myself as a writer; even though it feels almost like a hobby to me as I get so much enjoyment out of it. When working on my book the goal is to get it published one day and make some money from it, so surely this is also work?

I guess I have essentially given myself the title of ‘Writer’ and luckily I’ve not had anyone question it, but I’m still unsure whether this is deemed as acceptable in the writing community.

What do you guys think?

Picking up the Pieces.

Today is going to be a bit of a heart to heart. I haven’t blogged in a while and this post should hopefully explain some of the reasons why.

Some of you may, or may not know that I suffer with mental health problems. Unfortunately, this does not mean that I just feel a bit anxious sometimes or I get down in the dumps. I suffer quite intense mental health problems. Over the last year, I have struggled with my mental health more than ever before. I was officially diagnosed with depression and anxiety around July 2016 and was advised to take anti-depressants. I was also offered six free counselling sessions through my work which I could not have been more grateful for.

It’s eight months on and I’m finally beginning to feel like myself again; I have been back at work and I must say, I’ve thrown myself into it. Some people might think that I’m pushing myself too much however, I’m really loving feeling good again and I want to make the most of it.

Today, hasn’t been great. I received a rejection from a job that I had applied for, a job that I REALLY wanted. I had tried so hard at the interview and gave almost all I could, as you do in an interview, but unfortunately, it just wasn’t my time.

I had a cry of course, all the thoughts ran through my head like ‘All of that effort was for nothing.’ but, it wasn’t for nothing. It would be so easy for me to be disheartened about the whole situation but, this is not what is going to happen. I’m going to pick myself up and get on with it. I’m hoping more than anything that this will give me something to work on and I can use this opportunity to progress.

I have always been a strong believer that things happen for a reason and I’m sure there is a reason why this wasn’t my time, hopefully this will come to light eventually. Maybe there’s a publisher just waiting to pick up my book idea?! Haha, wishful thinking there!

Either way, if I look at this situation as a whole, it’s not ideal but, it’s amazing to see how far I have come. A few months ago I was so in the dark that I couldn’t see the light; now I’m able to pick myself up and look at the positives, this in itself is a massive achievement!

I have never really posted anything this personal on my blog however, I want anyone who is having a hard time to know that it can get better, you just have to be patient and persistent. You can do it!

If anyone needs any advice or just someone to listen, feel free to drop me a message. There’s nothing more rewarding than knowing that you can be there for someone in their time of need.

xXx

YA Rantings.

I have been struck down by some lurgy virus! I’m guessing this is my punishment for returning to work and trying to get on with my life…heh heh. Basically, I would rather be talking about this over on my YouTube however, my face and voice are both not camera friendly right now.

Today I want to talk about YA. YA is an abbreviation for Young Adult which, surprise surprise, is the title used for books that are aimed at young adults!

I want to start off by saying that I have not a single issue with YA, if it wasn’t for certain YA books, *cough* Twilight *cough*, I would not be so passionate about reading today. I have spent years delving in and out of the YA world from horror to contemporary to dystopian and I still have what feels like a never-ending pile of these books on my shelf however, I am beginning to feel that they will never be read.

Recently, whilst working on my novel, I hit a bit of a wall. I kept going over the paragraph I had just written and  was far from satisfied with it. After what felt like the millionth re-read I hit save and decided to take a time out. When I find myself deep in a creative block, there are a few things that I do in an attempt to inspire me; I read, watch something, listen to music, or, as I did that day, I watch YouTube videos; more specifically, Booktube videos. Booktube is essentially just the area of YouTube where creators will share their thoughts on books, discuss their most anticipated reads, their TBR (to-be-read) pile etc. etc.

So as I was watching Booktube videos something twigged. The Booktube world is FULL of YA. Now, this is not particularly a bad thing as it encourages youngsters to read which I think is such a wonderful thing however, I noticed that the majority of books I have been reading or purchasing were recommended by Booktubers therefore there tends to be a slight theme in that they are all Young Adult novels. Here lies my issue.

The realisation hit that these books that I had been reading were having an effect on my writing and I was essentially writing a Young Adult book. This may be completely fine for some however, as a twenty two year old, I have decided that I would like my novel’s main audience to be adults and would love for it to read with a sense of sophistication.

This was the moment where I deleted my work and decided to start from scratch; crazy I know, but at the time this is what seemed like the best decision for me and it’s working out pretty well so far. With the idea in mind that I would like to change my writing style, I began to edit my to-be-read list and picked up some books that were slightly more complex in language and story line. I have already began to notice the change in my writing and genuinely enjoy these books a lot more as I felt that YA was beginning to fall a bit short in my honest opinion. I am not in any way saying that I will never read another YA novel, but for now I’m changing things up a little and it’s given me my reading mojo back!

If you are also sick of YA BookTube then just do a little Google and you will find lists recommending non-YA booktubers. Also, as you may know, I have been slightly changing the content on my YouTube so that I can use it as a platform to talk about things that interest me, including books! My first bookish video is on The Shining and I’ll leave it below.

Thanks for reading, if you know any great blogs or YouTubers that review books then let me know!

xXx

 

 

 

Where am I?

It’s been a while. I apologise. If you didn’t know, I had been off work for a while however, I am now back to working full time which means things have slowed down slightly on the creative front just whilst I’m settling back in to my job.

I’m currently trying to balance working, writing a book and keeping up with all of this malarkey and it’s proving to be more difficult than I expected however, I am determined and writing is one of my main priorities so don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere!

I want to ensure that I give 100% to all my posts which is why I have chosen to write this explanation post tonight; I am far too sleepy to be writing anything reasonably decent right now!

Anyway, I hope you all can just bear with me for the time being & if you are really missing me then you can check out my YouTube where I have actually managed to upload a video recently!

Thanks for your patience!

xXx

 

 

 

Inside Out; My Thoughts & Theories

Do you ever get that feeling after you’ve watched, read, seen or even heard something and you just want to talk to everyone about it instantly? I really want this blog to be a space where I can express myself and discuss anything that may be of interest to me, and although this post may seem off topic, it touches on a few things that I am currently dealing with so I’m going to take the plunge.

Yesterday I saw an advert for Disney Pixar‘s film, Inside Out, and told my boyfriend that it has been on my ‘to watch’ list for a while. I had heard great things about it so, last night we sat down together and watched this animated, children’s film. It’s generally unlike me to actively watch an animation, especially when it’s target audience is about ten years younger than me, but there was just something about this film that caught my attention.

Riley is an eleven year old girl and she is also our main character. Her life is turned upside down when her parents decide to pack up and move away. Riley has to leave behind her friends, her school, her beloved hockey team and is expected to start from
scratch. Inside Out is ariley-sass-inside-out creative twist on how the mind works and we see that inside the character’s brains there are human-like creatures representing each emotion. There’s Joy, Sadness, Anger, Fear and Disgust and they each control how Riley is feeling. It turns out that everyone’s brains work in the same way; all controlled by these beings that represent different emotions.

Throughout the film we witness how different emotions affect our memories and we are very cleverly shown how the absence of certain emotions can alter our behaviours. As an audience, we begin to notice that a lot of the situations that occur in Riley’s mind are due to the simple fact that she is growing up and surprisingly, this was tough to watch. Personally, I associated the way that Riley was feeling with my own mental health; when she began to feel that particular emotions were no longer present in her day to day life, I related to that feeling. This is often how I can feel when I’m having a bad day with my mental health, whether that’s anxiety, depression or just generally feeling shitty: Sometimes I feel like my own personal ‘Joy’ will never return! It may not have been the creators’ aim to touch upon mental health, but I think everyone can interpret this film in their own way and this is what I took away from it.

bgrpj

Overall, Inside Out made me extremely thoughtful and resulted in reviewing how I deal with my own emotions. It is such a clever film that had us on the edge of our seats; it was engaging, intriguing and just a brilliant watch. I would highly recommend it to everyone.

xXx

Review: Slasher Girls & Monster Boys

**This review is spoiler free**

Slasher Boys & Monster Girls is an anthology of horror and thriller stories written mainly by young adult authors. Each tale has a little note at the end telling the reader where the author found inspiration; these inspirations are usually films, classic novels or songs and are cleverly recognisable without being too similar. When I first heard about this book I just new that I had to read it and I was lucky enough to receive a copy for Christmas.

19364719

The stories are selected by author April Genevieve Tuckolke who also has one of her own stories featured in the book; she suggests that the anthology is ‘For everyone who read Stephen King when they were way too young.’ Well that’s me then!

Slasher Girls & Monster Boys is the first book I have read in 2017 and I bloody loved it! I’m hoping that this is a good sign as to how my reading will go this year and that some more amazing novels will come my way.

What can I say about this book? Well, it’s certainly not for the faint hearted. Each story is as creepy as the one before and some of them are even pretty gory. As a strange individual who loves a bit of blood and guts, personally I loved the more gruesome parts, even though they did make me cringe. I am a firm believer that a horror should make you cringe or at least scare you. This book contains murder, amputation, the undead, The Devil, and tons more to keep you up at night.

One of my favourite stories was The Dark, Scary Parts And All by Danielle Paige who is also the author of the Dorothy Must Die series. This tale was inspired by Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein and the 1976 film The Omen. The main character in this story is Marnie who loves to read, is seen as a bit nerdy and gets severely bullied by a girl called Everly and her band of loyal followers. I genuinely felt like I could relate to Marnie so much as her time at school was extremely similar to my own. One day, the most popular boy in school, Damien, notices Marnie and every thing begins to change however, something doesn’t seem quite right. Unexplainable things begin to happen around Marnie and she begins to wonder whether it has anything to do with her mother’s suicide or her new friendship with Damien. If black magic, devil worship and a teeny bit of romance is your kind of thing, then you’ll love The Dark, Scary Parts And All.

Sleepless by Jay Kristoff was another incredible story. Kristoff ‘does not believe in happy endings’ and this most definitely shows in Sleepless. With more twists than I can count, I was gripped all the way through. A whirlwind online romance between wolfboy_97 and 2muchc0ff33_grrl quickly goes wrong when they finally meet. When it’s time for ‘coffee girl’ to meet the parents, it throws a real spanner in the works and she quickly finds herself in a catfish situation in the least predictable way. This story is inspired by the 1960 film Psycho and Mudvayne’sNothing to Gein“. Sleepless is bound to keep you on the edge of your seat and re-thinking your internet friendships.

That’s just an insight to a couple of the amazing tales in this anthology. I seriously suggest this to any reader who loves horror and wants an easy yet exciting read. This is the first time in a while that I have read short stories and I really enjoyed the variety and it’s always a bonus to discover new authors to explore.

If you decide to read this book I would love to hear your thoughts & remember…..

READING IS COOL!